In college I was short on rent one month so I decided to enter a karaoke contest. I had to sing two songs, one was a warm up and the second was for the cash. The prize was $100 and that was just about what I needed. I tried my luck at Killing Me Softly (Fugees version) and it was fun, but I was glad I didn’t choose that for the real song. Then a guy in a wheelchair did an A-MAZING rendition of Eminem’s Without Me and the crowd went nuts. I was sure I was beat but I got myself together and went on to sing A Woman’s Worth by Alicia Keys. It was fun, I was energized and I really had a great time. And I won! No eviction that month! Yahoo!
Too bad it went to my head and I made the very poor decision to try out for a local radio show contest called “Paintball Karaoke”. It was as bad as it sounds. But I’ll go on. The rules were that you had to sing a WHOLE song while standing inside of a taped off little square WHILLLLLE being shot at by 3 different paintball gunman at point blank range. The prize? ONE THOUSAND DOLLARS.
Now, the idea was that if you can sing you don’t get shot. But the crowd quickly realized that it was much more fun to boo even the good singers and watch them squirm. I almost threw up due to the pain so I forfeited. 18 welts later! I’m not saying I would have won. But I like to think I would have at least made the top 3. The winner that night was a dead ringer for Run DMC. He was good.
My point here is that there is a time and a place for everything.
Isn’t it funny how people so often try what worked that one time only to realize that it doesn’t work again? It can be so very frustrating when things just don’t go my way. And how I can get so wrapped up in doing that I don’t even realize that I am now gleaning my worth from some skill or gifting. It’s a slippery slope. I’ve been thinking a lot about my value as a woman, mother, wife, friend, daughter, sister, blogger and all around human lately. Chances are, I’ll be writing about it quite a bit in the coming weeks because I think there is some depth to be explored here.
Not so much my own personal depth, but the idea of value in general. Why do I crave it? Why does its very definition seem to change with every phase of life?