Every morning when I go in to Oscar’s room, he greets me with a smile. He jumps up and down and I nurse him and change his diaper. Most mornings, our “conversation” goes like this:
Me: Good morning Oscar, I love you!
Oscar: Dada Dada Dada
Me: Would you like some milk?
Oscar: (drinks for a while then looks around) Dada Dada Dada
Me: All done? Ok let’s get you a diaper
Oscar: (whispering) da da da da DADA
We then walk into the bedroom to see DaDa. A VERY welcome sight.
A lot of moms might be frustrated by this. Even I have had moments when I think hey baby! Where’s the Mama love??? But the fact is, children need their fathers. And humans need our Heavenly Father. We are wired for it. We are designed to yearn for the leadership and guidance of a Father and even our hearts wake in the morning searching for Him.
Recently, as I watched a husband and father choose himself over his wife and children and walk away, my heart was crushed for them. I have been walking with this sister for years and to see such a hurtful and tragic event happen to her breaks me. I have known rejection and it is a pain I wouldn’t wish on my worst enemy. I have nothing to offer but my prayers, my presence and my support. My heart grows bitter toward the man, though I know even my Father would advise me to love.
We are not meant to live without a Father.
God knows this. He knows our hardships and he knows our suffering. That doesn’t make it easy, but we can remember His promises in the dark hours.
Have I not commanded you? Be strong and courageous. Do not be terrified; do not be discouraged, for the LORD your God will be with you wherever you go. – Joshua 1:9
And my God will meet all your needs according to his glorious riches in Christ Jesus. – Philippians 4:19
God, who has called you into fellowship with his Son Jesus Christ our Lord, is faithful. -1 Corinthians 1:9
My comfort in my suffering is this: Your promise preserves my life. – Psalm 119:50
We can’t always choose how life happens to us. But we do have a measure of control over how we react to it. This is where grace comes in and our emotions go out. We can hurt, wail, cry and lament and God will hear us. But He doesn’t stop at hearing. He gives us the grace to make the best of it. He comforts. He preserves. He supplies. He stays.
I don’t have answers. I can’t bring this father back. I can’t say many of the things I really want to say. I can’t predict the future. What I can do though, is pray that God the Father will not only fill in this massive void, but overflow this family with love, security, hope and peace. He can do that. And I believe He will.