It’s the end of an era. As of yesterday, we no longer have any children in preschool. Today, Oscar finished first grade and in just 8 short weeks, we’ll be the proud parents of a kindergartener and a second-grader.
Here’s the part where I am supposed to be sad. But you know what? I’m not. Not even a little bit.
I sobbed when Oscar “graduated” from preschool. Our school loves to twist the knife with the adorably tiny caps and gowns and the music. I was totally not ready for it with Oscar. All the emotions hit me like a Mack truck. And I didn’t even have any tissues!
This year, I was ready for waterworks. I knew it was coming. I even brought tissues. But instead of mourning the passage of time, I found myself really excited for the future. I looked up at my fiery, strong Calvin having a blast on stage and I was so excited for his next step I just couldn’t stop smiling. And waving.
And making silly faces.
Earlier this week, I went to the elementary school talent show to see Oscar perform and got really excited at the thought of having both my boys there next year. I am so ready for this next step and my lack of sadness over the preschool milestone might seem strange to some, but not to me. I’m about to enter my parenting prime and I know it.
I know a lot of moms who love squishy babies. They love to sniff and squeeze and snuggle. I was never that mom. Not even with my own sweet boys. I mean, of course, I loved to snuggle them. But once they moved on to a new stage I was just as excited for that one. I meet each new milestone with open arms and kindergarten is no different.
Each time Oscar tells a new joke he heard or made up, I beam with joy at his timing and wit. I love it when Calvin can retell a story based on a movie he sees or a book we read. Each layer of communication that builds on the last is like a brick in the wall of team family.
When the babies are babies, it’s so hard on the mother. As moms, we know we have support but there is so much left in our brains. So much that is so hard to communicate. The transition to team family, where we can trade ideas and explain ourselves is so very very welcome to me. I’m loving it, even if I still have to do the dirty work of parenting.
This week has been really hard for me, personally. I’ve had to juggle far more than I normally do and with the added school activities on top of family life and my work responsibilities, I pretty much lost all sight of anything good for a minute.
Tonight it occurred to me that this week is very much like a birth. It has been hard, trying and laborious. I can liken the way I felt tonight to the transition period of labor, where the mother-to-be often says she can’t do it anymore. She has to stop.
But we all know birth doesn’t work that way. The baby WILL come out. The transition will end. And a new beginning awakens before her very eyes.
This is our life this week. This transition from a season of preparation to the challenging and beautiful new world of kindergarten. We’re stepping into the next phase with joy.
We are so proud of our boys for all of their hard work. We love them just the way they are, and we know they are ready for the next phase of life, together again in the same school. It’s an exciting time and we know it won’t be a perfect journey. But we are a team. And we’re going in strong.